subscribe » advertise » wholesale » contact us
ColumnsReviewsFeaturesRegionalVideosBlogs
/// HEARD IT THROUGH THE HOPVINE
 
OCTOBER/NOVEMBER 2000 » BACK TO HOPVINE INDEX
 
HEARD IT THROUGH THE HOPVINE
Speaking of rat pee, about the time the wildly popular TV “reality show” “Survivor” was getting down to the rat and the snake, Joe Costello, an Irish Member of Parliament, was recommending that pub owners and brewers take extra precautions to guard the necks of beer bottles from contamination by rat urine. He warned that such contamination can lead to Weil’s Disease and potential death. Weil’s Disease? Does that make you break out singing light opera? (Apologies to Kurt.) Pub owners, keep them bottles covered! (Thanks to Steve Beaumont for that forward from the Irish Times)…

And speaking of “Survivor,” Kelley gets a pass for an evening on the yacht away from rat du jour and worse, and she immediately gets her hands on a frosty cold bottle of … Bud Light? Oh well, they are one of several major-megabuck sponsors kicking down three- to six-hundred thousand clams per spot on the “reality-based” show…

Sean Connery, the suave Scottish actor who embodied Ian Fleming’s British secret agent 007 in the original “James Bond” films, turned 70 recently. Connery has often been described as Scotland's foremost Scot and “the world's sexiest man.” He was knighted by Queen Elizabeth in July — only two years AFTER he was reportedly denied a knighthood because of his Scottish nationalism! Oh, James! Connery is a high-profile supporter of the Scottish National Party, now the official opposition in the home-rule Scottish parliament. He is also a vociferous campaigner for an independent Scotland. Connery invariably will be remembered as James Bond, the character he immortalized in the first Bond film, “Dr. No,” in 1962. Actually, Connery is not the suave, debonair character of Bond legend, but instead grew up in the slums of Edinburgh. He once worked as a coffin polisher. Born Thomas Connery on August 25, 1930, he was brought up in poverty and never attempted to disguise his unrefined Scottish accent. He prefers beer to James Bond's vintage wine and vodka martini cocktails that are “shaken, not stirred.” Sean, we propose a toast with a great beer “From Russia with Love,” and may your “Goldfinger” be used to order yet another “Thunderball” brewski because “You Only Live Twice”…

Magic Hat Brewery’s One-Nut Brown Ale will be coming out under the name Participation Ale as a social lubricant designed to act as a catalyst for public discourse during the Presidential elections. Maybe it will help the malapropos-prone George Dubya to articulate a little more accurately. If not, the Hat’s “Heart of Darkness Stout” will be back mid-November…

And speaking of interesting beers, all you lonely guys and gals will appreciate a new release from Four Peaks Brewing in Tempe, Ariz., called “Blind Date Ale.” They use dates for extra sugar in the brew, and it comes out at 7.1% — just about right to make Mr. or Ms. Wrong start looking a little more right.

“Help! I’m melting!” Dept.: British breweries complain that they lose 300,000 empty beer kegs a year, many of them to thieves who melt the aluminum down into scrap metal. Naturally, there is a techie solution. Philips Semiconductors is equipping kegs for breweries such as Edinburgh’s Scottish Courage with tamperproof I.D. transponders that radio back each keg’s location. The results? One keg was found being battered about by a huge polar bear at a zoo, several were discovered in various basements including a convent, a police station and Britain’s House of Commons. Two empties were located in London’s famed Big Ben clock tower, and one full keg was located buried in a Scottish graveyard! Who said you can’t take it with you?…

Getting Stoned in the Land of the Midnight Sun Dept.: Barb Miller, VP and “La Femme de Marketing and Sales” for Midnight Sun Brewery in Anchorage, is trippin’ to tell us that Alaska's first and only Steinbeer has just been brewed. You won’t take this one for granted ’cause it’s made with real granite! Think of it — a beer that gets its rocks before you do! Leave no beer un-stoned…

A gent spots a nice-looking gal in a bar, goes up and starts small talk. Seeing that she doesn’t back away, he asks her name. “Carmen,” she replies. “Who named you, your mother?” “No, I named myself,” she answered. “That's interesting. Why Carmen?” “Because I like cars, and I like men," she says, looking into his eyes. “What's your name?” The guy replies, “Beersex.”…

Not too different from the gang on HBO’s “Sex and the City” where Sarah Jessica Parker’s character Carrie Bradshaw was sucking on a Rolling Rock with her new male friend of mixed sexual orientation who had… a Sam Adams. Who’s in charge of product placement?

The brewing artifacts exhibit at the Jewish Museum in New York City contains a rare a set of Mesopotamian clay tablets dating from the same period that depict a woman drinking beer during sexual intercourse (see Willi Loob’s article in this issue). Well, now, I guess we’ll just have to revise that famous t-shirt to read: “Beer — Helping Ugly People Have Sex for Over 5,000 Years!”

 

Advertisement

 

home » columns » reviews » features » regional » videos + » blogs » events » subscribe » advertise » wholesale » contact us

© Celebrator Beer News | Dalldorf Communications, Inc. All rights reserved. Hosting provided by RealBeer.