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/// HEARD IT THROUGH THE HOPVINE
 
OCTOBER/NOVEMBER 1997 » BACK TO HOPVINE INDEX
 
HEARD IT THROUGH THE HOPVINE
Check out the new movie "A Smile Like Yours" starring Lauren Holly ( Jim Carrey's X) and Greg Kinnear which was filmed at 20 Tank Brewery in San Fran's nouveau hip SOMA. The detail-oriented producers made a model of the brewery's bathroom area for their set! That's about as close as a "john" gets to immortality, eh? While on location at "The Tank," Lauren Holly made an off-the-wall request to her location crew when she said that she wanted to buy the Knick' art off the walls (her brother's name is Nick). She wasn't very happy when the Tankers told her location team, "Sorry" ... but that she could order it through 20 Tank owner John Martin. Make that TWO immortalized "Johns" at the Tank...

Let's Ask Mr. Know-it-all, Dept: Taken from Q&A in NEW SCIENTIST magazine: "Q. I have heard that it is possible to live on Guinness and milk alone. Is this true or even partially true? A. This is not quite true. Guinness does contain many vitamins and minerals in small quantities but is lacking vitamin C, as well as calcium and fat. So, to fulfill all of your daily nutritional requirements you would need to drink a glass of orange juice, two glasses of milk and 47 pints of Guinness." Now THERE's a diet I could get serious about!...

What day wouldn't be complete without someone e-mailing you the classic xenophobic Oregon beer joke: A Texan, a Californian and an Oregonian were out camping in the woods. As they sat around their campfire drinking, they began to brag about the virtues of their home states. Suddenly the Texan took a big swig off a bottle of Tequila, threw it high into the air, whipped out a set of six-shooters and nailed the bottle. The Californian said, "Wow, man, what a waste of good liquor!" The Texan replied, "Hell, we got plenty of that where I come from." Then the Californian took a big swig out of a bottle of Chardonnay and threw it up into the air, whipped out a semi automatic pistol and cut that bottle clean in half. The Texan said, "Whoa! What a waste of good wine!" The Californian replied, "Nahhh, we got plenty of that where I come from." Next the Oregonian took out a bottle of microbrew, drank it down to the last drop, threw it high into the air, whipped out a hunting rifle, fired a plug straight into the Californian and caught the empty bottle of microbrew before it fell. The Texan said, "Whoa! Why'd you do that?" The Oregonian answered, "We got plenty of those where I come from and besides, this bottle's worth a nickel!"...

Just when you thought all the great beer names were taken, Lovejoy's, an Austin, TX, bar which recently became a brewpub, put its creative thinking cap on and came up with Harper Valley IPA. Jeanie C. Riley would be proud! (Thanks to chronic Beer & Loafing chronicler John M. Setzler, Jr. for the above.)...

Always pleased to remember that the shape of plant collenchyma cells and the shape of the bubbles in beer foam are the same — they are orthotetrachidecahedrons. Care to sing a chorus of "Tiny Orthotetrachidecahedrons, Mr. Ho?"...

Don't Pass Out — Passover! The BATF may have ultimate authority over what's brewing in these here United States of America, but we're equally sure that a new contract beer called "He'Brew — The Chosen Beer" (which is being lovingly crafted by "Rabbi" Ken Allen at his Anderson Valley Brewing Co.) will have to be judged by, shall we say, a "higher" authority. They just released their "Genesis Ale." Can we expect to see a "Kosher Kölsch," "Passover Pils" or "Rosh Hashanah Red?" All this is from the malty mind of Jeremy Cowan and his Shmaltz Brewing Co. Will his motto be "Shmaltz, The Beer That Made Milwaukee Nervous?"...

Is Nothing Sacred? Dept: West Ham Rugby Team manager Harry Redknapp has called time on beer-drinking players at the English premier league club. "Footballers in this country now are very, very highly paid," he told BBC radio after the news that West Ham had banned alcohol from their players' bar. "We used to look at the Italians and think that was the place to be and that they were dedicated and didn't drink. I think we've got to go down the same road." He said he did not think it right for players to finish a match and then go and drink lager. West Ham famously once lost a match after four senior players were seen drinking in a nightclub on the eve of a game. Perhaps they should switch to ale? (Many thanks to Reuters News Service for bringing us this sad news on the sorry state of Rugby in the UK.)

Smoke 'em If You Got 'em Dept: That cigar thing is really taking the beer world by cloudy storm! Beer and Cigar dinners abound. Several brewpubs like Barley & Hopps in San Mateo, CA, or Pike Brewery in Seattle have designated cigar rooms. B&H has one of the largest, with some 140 different single malt Whiskeys! Meanwhile, the State of California is poised to shut down ALL smoking in ALL public space January 1, 1998! If you DON'T think the State of CA knows what's best for you, better let 'em know right now. Choice and personal freedoms seem to be going the way of the Cohiba Esplendido. All those humidors may be destined to become pencil boxes. And I only recently learned that a "humidor" was not a comedian bullfighter...

 

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